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(30 qershor 2007-)
+9:44 e pasdites]*
# Disappointment-
Im here to blog again.. Though late for my "mini-gathering"!
But suddenly feeling disappointed.. friends..
My most important tin in Life is friend.. I guess most of the ppl out there noes..
But it just seem lyk the bonds we built in those two/five years were gone.. So easily?..
Though I said "mini", I din mean it to be so "mini" until oli 4 of us, including me to "gather"..
It just take 1 day of u ppl.. To maintain the frenship for, mayb years?? Difficult?
Yes, there may be other chances to go out.. But if ur mindset is lyk tis, den u wont even go once.. cuz u'll be thking, "aiya, will have next outing wan mar.. dont go tis wan nvm."
FIVE years, we've built up lots and lots of memories..
I thought my secondary scool frens would be my frens for Life..
But it seem I've put too much expectation in it..
Most disappointed in myself. For I've committed the same mistake twice! This time, for investing too much on frenships..! I mean, yes, ppl have different priorities first, I just hate myself for putting frens first..
Disappointments again and again..
From all these experiences, I learned tat nothing will last forever..
Not love, not frenships.. Brotherhood?? Perhaps?
I've lost enough.. Love, and now maybe frens..
I dunno how much longer I can stand and face the "obstacles" in life..
Cuz the tins tat topple off were the most important tins in my life..
Helpless...! WE HAVE SCATTERED.. WE HAVE SCATTERED FAR..!
I hope that's not how we end..;
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+1:30 e pasdites]*
# Transformer!-
Woooot! =]
At first thought today will be just another boring day! But Transformers TRANSFORMED my day sia..
LOL..!
So happy lor.. Satisfying day.. Haha..
At first thought going out so late den going home by cab abit sianz...
Luckily Transformers nice movie! lol..
So damn nice la.. The graphics and all, even the story plot is nice, one word, WONDERFUL!
Haha.. So long din watch such nice movie liao... So very satisfied today..!
At first abit sian la.. Cuz tml de tins.. Haiz.. Ask ppl out but they treat our "outing" lyk their second choice!
Sad la.. Its not one or two of them.. Its sooo many of them lor! Haiz..
Or isit i got no "power"?? So ask them they dont thk important?? Damn sian la..
Haiz.. EXCUSES!! Sianz..
Tml dunno fun anot lor.. At first still quite looking forward to it.. But now....
Dunno la..
Tml oso dunno gonna go kbox or watch movie again..! Haha.. Personally, dont feel lyk watching la..!
Cuz today juz watch nia.. =X
Feel lyk SINGING! Haha.. But mei lyk sang for once this week liao.. Next week gonna go two more times sia!
Power..! LOL! Dunno how she gonna "survive".
Heard she broke liao lor.. *Pian mama de qian rite?* lol..
I oso no better lar.. Gonna buay tong liao! Haha..
But dont really care la.. Chuan Dao Qiao Tou Zi Ran Zhi! =]
Maybe go *pian mama de qian* oso after Im broke! Haha.. XD
Alrite, shall go to bed now.. Slping in YZ's house today! Gonna wake up at 10am tml.. If not late AGAIN! lol..
Stop here le. NITES!
I hope that's not how we end..;
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(29 qershor 2007-)
+7:50 e paradites]*
# Nothingness-
Waseh.. Today is SUPER sian..!
Den bloody hot oso lor.. Keep on sweating! Even at night..
Damn..
Hope tml will not be lyk today.. stay at home one whole day sia...
Haiz.. Sianz!!
I hope that's not how we end..;
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(28 qershor 2007-)
+11:28 e paradites]*
# 好心做坏事!=(-
Today 1pm finish scool le..
Got back my POA result too.. 93/100!
Good? Haha.. I doubt so..
Cuz I did POA before le.. So supposingly I should top this module..
But its ok.. Satisfied wif it..! =]
After finishing scool, went home straight..
At first thought dont wanna go out le.. Just stay at home for the rest of the day..
But CK called and somehow "asked" me to go out..! Haha..
Actually is Sam ask me to jio him out no matter wad.. Cuz today is their 6months anniversary! So she gonna gif him a suprise.. Haha.. So sweet rite?
Gonna find a galfren lyk his lor.. Haha..
He so damn fortunate la! Hao Xie Mu Ar!!!
lol..
Actually can quite early go back de.. But heard from Aaron they all, ALOT
malays came to AMK central.. Very "dangerous" to go at that moment..
Quite serious though.. Alrdy 4 ppl from AMK got hacked by them liao..!
So go down AMK central muz take extra care!
Den after that went to Boon's house to play majong..! Haha..
At first so happy sia!! Thought I won a 5 folds at second round lor!
But actually I "xiao xiang gong"!! tmd.. Got to pay them so more..
But luckily in the end oli lose 90 cents nia.. Boon poor tin lar..
Lost $7.90 LOR!
Haiz.. After our majong session, we went home..
Den when i reaching home, I recalled I put my drink on his computer desk..
I scared will attract ants.. So quickly sent a msg to him.. Thought lyk that wont make life difficult for him.. But in the end, I SENT THE MSG TO HIS HOME NUMBER...!!!!
GOD noes y.. Damn! Den he got scolded by his Dad lor.. So damn guilty lar..
Sorry Boon.. Felt lyk I made ur life much more difficult instead..!
Really sorry bro... =(
Haiz.. Really is 好心做坏事 lor.. Damn.. Stupid me.. Sianz..!
I hope that's not how we end..;
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(27 qershor 2007-)
+7:36 e paradites]*
# I pray..-
Overslpt today..
So din manage to go scool for morning lesson..
Din manage to see my grade for MAEC too..
But heard from frens, all passes.. Highest score was 19/20..!
Haiz.. I'm not one of them.. A little disappointed!
Today finally got my hair cut.. So ugly lor.. REGRETED cutting there sia..
Should have tried JeanYip instead..! Haha..
But broke liao.. So dropped the idea..
So sian today! Arghhhhhhh!
I think tml should be the same..
Such a pity lor.. 1pm finish scool lei..
Maybe try to find ppl to go out tml..
Hmm.. Shall skip my guitar lesson tml too..
So sad lor.. 11th week of scool, and I just went for once!
Haiz.. As usual la.. Today feeling a little down.. Missing her..
Tried not to msg her, and I succeeded..
That's why feeling "not so good" now..
Looking for someone to chat with! But there was none.. No mood for anytin..
Tml getting back POA test results.. Hope it's wad I had expected..!
Den at least I have something to feel good about in myself..
Life so sian!! Nothing to look forward to..
MEANINGLESS AR!!!
I hope that's not how we end..;
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(26 qershor 2007-)
+9:42 e paradites]*
# Thanks!!-
Boon!! Thanks for accompanying me to go Raiders..
I know you can simply reject when i ask u to go Raiders with me..
But you didnt.. Thanks!
=)
Even being in the penniless condition, you still agreed to go Raiders with me this Thursday! That should be the only thing which comfort me today..
Paiseh hor, BROs CK and Boon, I "burst" during the "pool session" with the both of you..
There's a reason for it..
But I know saying it out will result in restricting my Brother..
I dont wan that to happen!
I wan everyone to feel natural with me..
Not STRESS!
But today really till brim liao.. Cant bottle up the feeling anymore any longer..
But I will try not to vent on u BROs the next time yea?
Long ar.. You also! Haha..
Taking it out on pool is fine..
But make sure you will not affect others k?? =]
Wo Shi Guo Lai Ren, Shuo Yi Wo Zhi Dao! =x
Paiseh!! Cuz cant accompany you and Caleb till late night..
Wanted to.. But no money liao.. If I have I sure accompany the both of you den take cab home.. =]
You BROs are my everything now..! =]
Got anything just gif me a call ya?
I will come down for all of you no matter wad! =P
I hope that's not how we end..;
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+9:22 e paradites]*
# I FEEL like quiting..!-
Contradicting feelings in me today..!
Felt happy at first cuz can go Raiders with Boon..
But after tat, thking bout having to go scool tml, my mood fell from top of the world!
HAIz!
Dunno why.. Today keep having this thought in mind..
Feel lyk quiting scool.. Feel like slacking everyday doing nothing..
But wad can I do in future if I just quit scool like this??
Having just a 'O' level cert.. I can go nowhere..!
But just dont feel lyk studying now.. Maybe cuz this is not my interest??
I cant see myself having the potential to excel studying this course in future..
I AM CONFUSED..!!
Giving up seem to be an easy choice..
Too tempting..
Or I thk I have no motivation in this course bah..
The motivation to do well..
The feeling isn't there anymore..
But changing course will waste 1 semester!
And I don't know if I can find interest in Engineering..
Wad should I do..??
Shall I just gif up lyk tis??
I'm disappointed in myself!
I got knocked out by just 1 factor of my life..
Wifout her support.. It just feel so meaningless..
Wads love..? I feel so breathless, searching for the answer..
It can truly knock one out...
I hope that's not how we end..;
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(25 qershor 2007-)
+8:32 e paradites]*
# It's not just a Blog to me.. It's my DIARY! =]-
Yea! haha.. manage to reach scool on time today..
spent half of my day in scool lor! MAEC lecture.. Haiz..
NO LIFE!
den after scool we went to do project.. so ps sia..
i simply did nothing during tat two hours! Cant believe it lor..
Luckily my groupmates all 好人! Din angry with me.. =]
After tat went home slack whole day sia!
Most boring part of my day liao.. =P
But ok la.. Felt relax at home..!
Haha..
Actually, i treat my blog more lyk a diary la..
So not very worried tat i'll run out of topic to write..!
I can ALA quite a bit oso de lor! lol..
Tml.. HOLIDAY FOR ME!! haha.. Self-Declared one of course..
lol.. Go scool for 1 hour plus nia.. waste time for a useless module.. Might as well dont go sia.. haha..
*Hope my blog din offend u!! =x
I hope that's not how we end..;
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(24 qershor 2007-)
+12:27 e paradites]*
# Back to Square One. Trapping myself in circle.-
Wow!! Went out with KyiKyi and SweeBoon today..!
Today den found out KyiKyi oso can be quite stubborn at times.. lol..!
太客气了!
Late again la.. So sian lor.. haha..
Lucky Boon din late for too long.. If not ask KyiKyi down there wait for the both of us, SO MALU.. lol!
Met them at Mos-Burger.. After tat went to funland play pool..
The table lyk shit lor.. Haha..
Tey budget bah.. LOL..!
Den went to CK working there de coffee shop eat steamboat..! Walao.. 1 month dunno go there eat how many times sia..
After eating, KyiKyi go home liao lor.. She so 客气!Dont wan us treat.. Haha..
Tml scool re-opening lor! But I still stayed overnight at Boon's house..
Cuz dont wanna waste money take cab home..
I broke ler.. Haha..
Finally, my turn to broke..! =x
So ps lor.. scared boon thk i treat his house lyk hotel..! Haha.. But lucky he didnt.. Thanks BRO! =]
Saw you at SY house there de Mac.. Dunno wad to talk to u oso.. Haha..
But im glad tat u smiled for the whole time! *not lyk me* =P
I guess its lyk my title..? Back to square one..? The period of time u avoided me..
i guess history is repeating itself again bah..
Cant b helped either..
Perhaps, it's my Life.......
take care too..
I hope that's not how we end..;
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(23 qershor 2007-)
+7:21 e paradites]*
# Shag Lei!-
Wonder men! LOL..!
Din slp for 48 hours, nvm, today still went around AMK and CityHall to take photos of posters! WTH rite??
Haha.. It wasn't EASY lor.. To keep ur eyes open when u don't slp at night! =1
So damn shag sia.. Buay-ta-han lei..
Haha.. So funny also.. Wore the same tin as ytd(i got bathe, no worries!), den walk around at Suntec City tat area.
Den in the end finally reach tat damn Conrad Hotel..! Haha..
Reach liao nvm, yaozhong and i ps to go take the picture of the posters lor!
Cuz got ppl there smoking.. So stupid la..! Den the both of us waited down there lyk idiotS.. LOL..!
Den finally yaozhong "mustered" the courage to go take the photos, in front of the ladies who are smoking! So brave sia.. lol..
Just damn tired lor..
Walked 1 whole day ar..!!!
Waseh.. Really "lao" liao.. 1 night din slp nia, buay-ta-han liao lei..!
Haha..
But ok lar.. Cuz tml we'll be meeting KyiKyi.. Looking forward to tat noe..!
SHAG ARRR!!!... =!Emërtimet: The Past
I hope that's not how we end..;
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(22 qershor 2007-)
+1:43 e pasdites]*
# I WANT MY HAIR CUT!! =)-
Walao! Din manage to get a hair cut today lor.. Wake up alrdy 6pm something liao lor!
Damn! LOL.. Late for meeting JiaHao and YaoZhong.. As ALWAYS! Haha..
Went to play pool after tat.. Finally get to see Boon after last week's Sentosa..!
Sianz lor.. After I learn tat tis Sunday no Sentosa, more Sianz sia.. Haiz..
Scool reopening somemore..! But ok lar.. Cuz Sunday get to see KyiKyi!
Haha.. She gonna go Australia on monday lor.. Dunno when den can get to see her pretty face again..! =P
HAIZ..! Damn bored lar.. NO LIFE! haha..
Gonna go kbox someday..
After tat went to YaoZhong's house stay overnite.. Tml going out wif him.. Try and help him out on his project..
"Wo Chu Kou, Ta Chu LI!" LOL..!
Actually is more lyk i accompany him nia lar..
Next week gonna get back my results.. Hope it's wad i have expected.. Or even better..! I told her I'll tell her my results..
Hope it'll not disappoint her!
Haha.. Actually dont even noe if she will gif a damn to my tins.. Rmb? "I'm out of the picture".
But I just hope lar.. =]Emërtimet: The Past
I hope that's not how we end..;
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(21 qershor 2007-)
+5:05 e pasdites]*
# Attica night!-
Today went to tkd gathering.. But for awhile nia..
Nth special also. Haha..
Den after tat went Attica!
At first go in thought the dance floor sooooOO small nia.
See liao abit sian diao.. Den after tat found out tat still got second floor!
Went up there and see. Still okok lar.. Haha..
Just dance all the way! Den bloody hell, tey keep pushing me and Giovanna together..!
Paiseh lor! But cant show out sia.. LOL..
Got try and talk talk.. No feeling though..
Maybe cuz my heart still being filled??
Haha.. Most importantly, the whole time at Attica I damn HUNGRY!
Tat bloody Caleb..! Tell me go in first, den lata come out eat!
But the lata is until the event end.. tmd..! Haha..
After tat heard LiangXiang got wounded by Huan-Na..
Tio chiam.. den lie on the road wan die lyk tat.. Dunno where all his Brothers ran..
At first still got 1 big group de lor.. Den in the end left him alone down there on the road half dead.. Aiyo.. PAIKIA..!
So damn tired lor.. Lyk usual, miss my stop cuz i was slping on the bus! =P
Sianz lar.. Shall go get a hair cut by tml..! =]Emërtimet: The Past
I hope that's not how we end..;
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(20 qershor 2007-)
+9:22 e paradites]*
# DAMN BORED!-
Waseh.. Today and tml gonna b damn bored lar.. sianz dao..!
Haiz.. Nothing do de lor..
Feel lyk singing lei. But veryone broke liao.. haha..
I thk I also cannot ta-han any longer le bah..?
Financially unstable now lor!
But still dont feel lyk staying at home. Die die also must go out!
Haha.. Who noes?? Mayb go out can bump into the RIGHT girl..! =X
Never ever took number from a girl before.. Mayb can try during one of these days..?
Yea man.. Giving up my "FIRST" time..
LOL! =P
HAIZ.. Scool reopening in 5 more days nia lei! Sibei sianz lar!
Study again.. Projects and all.. Damn!
Haha.. But I guess it's a good thing.. At least I can keep myself occupied.
Den wont have time for other stuff..!
Just lyk the feeling of being accompanied by frens too..
It'd be best if can be wif frens everyday.. LOL..
Missingherdeeply..wadmightshebedoingatthemoment??ihavenoidea..lykaways,ihavenoidea..!Emërtimet: The Past
I hope that's not how we end..;
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(19 qershor 2007-)
+12:16 e pasdites]*
# 她永远都吾会同我一起。-
Time to realise the truth man!
Actually all along, I kept having fantasies of being together with her despite being through so much stuff..
But the truth is, we will never be able to be together.
I dont care whether she played me or not. It doesnt matter.
As long as i feel tat she has feeling for me at the time we are together, its more than enough man!
Haha.. Thinking back..
Will still feel happy while holding ur hands, though it was only once.
So sweet!
I will try and retain the memories with u in my mind, u too ya?
Haha.. Should be the last time I can say this to her: Loveya!
Hopefully after today, I will regain my "conciousness" and be the happy me..!
Bon Voyage for her journey!
Will defintely miss her..
It's high time i wake up my idea.. =1Emërtimet: The Past
I hope that's not how we end..;
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+1:27 e paradites]*
# 没有她的日子,第22天。-
Waseh! Though just starting of the day nia, wake up alrdy not happy liao..
Haiz.. Why muz I dream of her..?
In such a bad dream somemore!
I dont wan it to turn out lyk in the dream..
I really feel helpless..! Muz get out of the pit somehow...
Today went out to meet CK and Long at kpool..
In the end, end up watching two movies; Fantastic Four and Ocean's Thirteen.
Damn tired.. I noe I have to go to scool tml for my LMS project..
But still, Dont feel lyk going home.
Perhaps going home I'll think alot more..?
I noe she's not talking to me. I noe it..
But it's hard to face it.. I would lyk to go out rather dan staying at home..
But it seems lyk Im financially unstable now..
Actually, I will juz lyk to noe sometin from her.
Does she still have feelings for me?
I dont dare to ask.. Cuz Im afraid I will get the truth I disgusted..
If only I have a dream about tis...?
I hope it'll lead me bac to who i use to be..Emërtimet: The Past
I hope that's not how we end..;
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(17 qershor 2007-)
+11:25 e pasdites]*
# -
I hope that's not how we end..;
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+11:35 e paradites]*
# 没有她的日子,第21天。-
EMO day!!
Ahhh.. Haiz..
Going Sentosa should be fun lor.
But I also dunno I EMO for wad sia.
Sianz..! Reach there late.. AS USUAL!
Haha..
But really damn tired lor.. Cant be helped bah..
Tried to treat her lyk fren, but I guess too weird? Haiz..
Still tot of blocking her on msn! But I thk doesn't have to liao bah..
Haha.. Dont get to see her online anw. *clever ppl should noe wad Im suspecting!*
Drank Long Island today.. Dunno why lor! Just keep on drinking this few days...!
Not only drink lar.. BUT mei, no worries k? I promise I wont get addicted.. =P
Dunno how Ilead my life this few days also..
Felt so vague.
Lyk juz passing day by day wifout doing anytin meaningful..!
Dont wanna feel so "灰" anymore!
I have to get up somehow!! =?Emërtimet: The Past
I hope that's not how we end..;
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(16 qershor 2007-)
+12:59 e pasdites]*
# 没有她的日子,第20天。-
Today nothing much sia! But quite Emo actually.
With Caleb and Long, suddenly felt tat the 3 of us quite poor tin.
Ha! U're right.
Bcuz of girls. Again!
So sad lar. But really can't be helped.
After meeting them at caleb hse, me and long went on to bugis.
To search for his ink! Haha.. Almost all shops closing liao lor.
Lucky got 1 bro let us buy his damn black ink while tey closing..
Haha..
The event tonight more happening! Went to drink with Long and Caleb, sooOOO EMO at first. =X
Actually I okay liao lar. Cuz I manage to avoid thking bout it?? I guess so.
But felt happy with my BROs.. Cuz tey are the BEST!!
For some reason, I really felt Brothers more important.
Maybe Im starting to lose faith in relationships??
Tml, Sentosa.. I doubt if she will go lar.
But I hope I wont have silly tots ever AGAIN!
Hurts noe.. =1
Lets hope I can successfully treat her lyk a fren!!
Haha.. Anw, Thanks BROs. If not for all of u to be ther for me, I don't noe how I can get up again..
BROs forever. I MEAN IT!!! =PEmërtimet: The Past
I hope that's not how we end..;
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(15 qershor 2007-)
+8:38 e paradites]*
# 没有她的日子,第19天。-
好烦,好烦。
I thought by working myself off will let me have a peace of mind at least for the dae..
But it didn't. Din really last long.
On my way home, I thought again..
She's not trying to forget me. She's trying to help me forget her..?
I guess so.
It alrdy hurt oli by the thought of it..
Everytime when I thk I have alrdy climbed out of the pit, after contacting her, I would found myself in it again.
And it hurts every single time, just to realise tat Im in ther, and she's not ther for me.
I felt helpless. Totally helpless.
I have only 2 choices which might help me get out of tis miserable pit.
1. Ask her to be my girlfren.
2. Cut my contact wif her.
Can I do it? I wonder..Emërtimet: The Past
I hope that's not how we end..;
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(14 qershor 2007-)
+1:33 e pasdites]*
# 没有她的日子,第18天。-
Damn angry today! At first even thought of blocking her on msn..!
Since she don't wanna see me. Wad for i still thk of her, longing to see her?
Haiz..
At first still thk its good.. Cuz can get to see her! haha..
But it turn out tat it wasn't! Damn disappointed la!
Thought tat she was childish.. Why did she have to go to the extend of asking sy to stay wif her when wad I gonna do was juz to go and take my presents?!
And even have to ask sy to pass it to me.. It's pretty obvious, she doesnt wanna see me..! Damn disappointed.. Wad did i do to deserve tis?
I tot she was thking too much.
But it wasn't.
I tried to forget her. But I couldn't.
I tried to hate her. But I failed too.
HA! In the end, i found an excuse for myself..
Maybe the reason why she doesn't wan to see me is bcuz she wans to forget all bout me? If tats so.. I do stand a place in her heart? Do I?
For her to go to tat extend to forget bout me..
Felt better thking tis way though..
I know Im getting deeper..
But I juz cant help but to thk of her..!!=X
In the end when I found out tat she was going to meet Bee tey all,
I actually tot of not going..
Mayb it'll be better? Who knows?
But in the end, I went. Im hopeless. I knew it the moment I see her..
But wad can I do?..
i tried to ignore her..
Tried to act normal..
But I cant..
Drank alot though..!
It really wasn't easy.
I know its hard for her too.. I know..Emërtimet: The Past
I hope that's not how we end..;
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(13 qershor 2007-)
+5:15 e paradites]*
# 没有她的日子,第17天。-
Ha! First time blogging.. This few weeks wasn't very happy though.
Only until 090607!!! I guess I was more "touched" than happy..
haha.. I may be a sadist! Cuz I actually felt happy when i learned that ck "quarrelled" with sam for coming to sentosa,
not just for fun, but for my Birthdae!
That's wad i call BRO.. LOL!
Touched by yaozhong too.. Cuz he actually came to sentosa for my Birthdae! haha..
Not only that, he drank with us too.. *I don't know whether he went there just cuz of me lar..! (poking again) LOL!
Mei and Long, both organised my Birthdae and asked people out to buy presents the dae before.
If both of you did not do that, i really doubt anyone else will know when's my Birthdae!! =]
Thanks everyone.. That should be my happiest day, or rather most "touched" day in this few weeks!
Loveuguys..
take care!!Emërtimet: The Past
I hope that's not how we end..;
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